One of the obstacles I have faced was on the rafting trip, I actually faced many obstacles those few days and this is the story told from my perspective. And Peter I would prefer that you not read it, Thank You.
The first day we go to this cabin in the woods and its great, we play a bunch of games all that crap that’s boring and you don’t want to do it you just want to sit down and enjoy the outdoors. So the first day is fine except for a few kids being mean to me on the bus. So, the first day is fine then we move on the second day, so we have to go on a ropes course and I am afraid of heights. So There’s three levels and along with some other kids I go to level one around 20 feet high which doesn’t sound much but when our up there and it feels like your not holding on to anything it’s a lot. So, I walk across a log and then get down. So then, 4 hours later everyone else gets off, so then we have lunch, which isn’t very good or healthy. And we have free time for a while so we can do what we please.
And I’m sharing my cabin with 5 other guys and none of them are very mature I mean there crazy, so two of them make it to the room first (Joey and Lucas) and the close and lock the door, so the other three guys are playing along but I just wanted to get in. So they finally open the door but they don’t undo the lock (these doors you can lock it and the other side can’t get in but open the door and the next time it closes it locks, so the next thing we knew were locked out of the cabin, and we have to wake up at 5:30 in the morning tomorrow, so at like 9:00 at night (after dinner) we tell the teacher before the bonfire thing.
So then everyone finds out and another teacher speaks up before the whole class and says “Joey Jonny and Joe there always involved in the trouble” which is sometimes to but not in this case at the time of the opening of the door after it locks Joey runs outside and I shut the door behind him but before he’s fully out the door hits him in the leg. So I’m outside helping Joey feeling really bad for him because he’s crying so then around five minutes later he’s ok and goes to the camp fire and I go inside to find that they’ve locked themselves out, so then we all go up to the campfire and then that teacher says that stuff about us being trouble makers and the story goes on.
Alex G started crying not to long before the bonfire partly because all the eight years were leaving and partly because…I can’t tell you, she told me not to tell anyone so that will have to be kept with me, (and I don’t lie or not keep other people secrets, except once around a year ago) anyway at that point everyone knew that I really liked Alex Daniel's so that’s out so I’m talking to Alex about that previous weekend and her going to the mall with all the other seventh years and at that point she was upset with the other girls, so I go over to Blake and ask her why her and the other girls are being mean to Alex D and why Alex G is crying so she bring me over to Alex G and I ask and she said “Ill tell you later”,
So then Blake and I walk away and I ask her why she and the other girls are being mean to Alex and she is almost at tears because she thought I was mad at her (and when you think that someone who like is mad at who you get pretty upset) and I wasn’t I wasn’t mad at anyone. So she says she doesn’t know and then it happens, she and every single girls except Hannah which Im talking to now go over to where Blake is and talk, Hannah and I talk about stuff, including the time that we liked each other (two years ago) and never told each other even though on some level we both knew) Ok so then the fire is over and we’re walking back and I’m walking with Jonny and Shelby and she totally became mean when she started dating jonny. So then, she said three words to me “Nice going Joe.” Sarcastically of course so I have know idea what Blake said over there, so then we come back and find that were still locked out so I have to sleep with jonny, Joey and Lucas in one room.
And this is where there immaturity breaks out, I mean I’m not going to tell you what they said. We are sleeping in our clothes and Jonny and I are on a bed with no sheets or no pillow, while Joey and Lucas a right in front of us on nice cushiony beds sheets and pillows, totally unfair, but I didn’t complain because I had bigger issues. So then Joey and I talk, (he was over there with Blake) so she had given him a message to give me and it was “I will physically and mentally hurt you if you do that to a girl ever again.” And the next one was “fuck you” but that didn’t have much sense to it.
So by the end of the night I had it all figured out with joey and jonny, Blake thought that I went over to her and went and asked her why she was being mean to Alex because (she thought this) I was using her, to make it look to Alex D that I was a good guy. I would never in my life use anyone, nobody, even if I had just met them and I had an opportunity. I would never do that. So she says that to everyone (that’s why all the girls were mad at me) that I used her, everyone. All the girls hated me. And Im not sure what Alex thought about all this, so Im freaking out, I can’t believe that she would make up such crap.
So then the next day I go to Blake’s seat and she’s sitting with Alex D and I ask Alex if I can talk to Blake privately so I tell Blake that I would never do that to anyone, and she agreed with no fuss, and I gave her a hug and we were fine. But all the other girls have to find out that I didn’t do anything bad. So then I go back to my seat go to the rafting thing and come back tired and wet, so I take a shower and get dressed and all that stuff, and then we have dinner and that’s fine and then we go to bed, now Joey is on a bunk bed right above me, and he could hear everything the girls were saying through an air vent above us, don’t worry he didn’t eavesdrop he’s a good guy, he talked to two different cabins each containing six girls.
(At this point our teacher had unlocked our cabin and were in it and it’s right under the girls cabin) So we find out that Kathryn is crying and I thought that it had something to do with me, because we had a very short relationship around two weeks before. And we both said that it would be hard to withstand the lack of communication over the summer and decided to brake up. So Kiana tells joey to tell me that Kathryn said “Ill get you back.” So that could be taken in a romantic way or a harsh way. None of us were sure. So then we go to sleep and then we wake up, we go to breakfast to find out that Kiana lied and that Kathryn crying didn’t have anything to do with me.
So all the guys sit together at one table and im sitting there and I can’t take it anymore they were being loud and having weird conversations so I go to where Jonny Shelby and Alex D were sitting. So I sit down and just sit there, I didn’t feel like eating, so I didn’t eat breakfast. and then Alex gets up and follows her, were standing in this small place where nobody can hear us and that’s when I tell her that I was in love with her, and that I was sorry but I along with every human on earth cant control or contain how they feel. So she has know idea what to say, and is all-awkward.
So I leave and she follows I sit at the table and she sits across from me, this is the point where I wanted to kill myself. I was the most depressed I had been in my life and for the next two hours it stayed that way. So it looks like Alex wanted to talk to the people at the table about what I had said of course so I decided to leave so that she could talk to them, because love can really control you and you’ll to anything to make them feel the same way. And you want to make them happy even if it doesn’t benefit yourself. So I leave and immediately she starts talking to them. So then I leave and go back the cabin and start packing because were going to leave. So once I was finished I went outside, and just watched the trees and observed nature. I sat there thinking; mostly about Alex because that was the biggest problem I was facing at the time. And then everyone comes back (I left breakfast like 20 minutes early)
So then I sit there for around fifteen minutes and then Alex G comes over, and sits beside me, I cant tell you what she said to me, but I can tell you this, every moment I was at the breaking point of tears. We talked for around fifteen minutes, and then our teacher said we had to go home, so we played some games and went on the bus. From the moment I told Alex that I loved her until half way on the bus ride I was the most depressed I had been in my life and every single person on that trip asked me first “Are you O.K?” and to some of my friends I replied “yeah” and to my really close friends I would say “No” and they would say “is there anything I can do.” And to every single one of them I would say “There's nothing anybody can do.”
Two days later I wrote a poem about all this, about love, I really like poetry and have written a lot of it, but I woke up at two in the morning and felt like writing, So I grabbed my laptop and just started, it just came out, I didn’t have to think. So then I talk to Alex D the entire way back on the bus except for maybe half and hour at the end when I fell asleep. And she said that there was a chance that after the summer she might like me back. That she would change and I confirmed it. But the thing about Alex is that she is so nice that to my knowledge (I haven’t known her as long as you so you know her history a lot better and what she’s done) but to my current knowledge she has only lied because she didn’t want to hurt someone else’s feelings. So around five or ten minutes after she said that I knew that this was one of those times.
Repeatedly she would ask (this is right before the bus) “is there anything I can do” just like the rest of my friends. And around a week later I asked told her that we both know that there is no chance for us and that she were just saying that to make me feel better. And she confirmed it. And that’s when I started to get over her, and if you’ve ever been in love, you know how hard it is. And recently like three or four days ago I stopped liking her. However, writing all this has just brought back some feelings, memories, and how great it was to be with her, but nothing gold can stay.