Another set of notes to prep for therapy.read more
No new dreams. Had panic issue day and night before big meeting. Went through meeting anyway. Felt a bit bad the rest of the day but pushed through it and felt better. Been a lot easier to calm myself down by thinking: “nothing is blowing up. You can just sit back and enjoy the ride”. Been feeling very tired, like almost falling asleep, by like 4-5pm at work. Sleeping decently, not great, but bearable. Basically 3-4 hours of uninterrupted sleep, then the rest is very broken if I sleep at all. Wondering if the Prozac is preventing me from sleeping. Melatonin hasn’t really made much of a difference. Should I ask my psychiatrist about going off Prozac to help sleep? I am nervous he’ll want to put me on yet another drug to help with sleep. I don’t want to go on more. Previously, I would approach tasks / even enjoyable things, like reading an article, as like a task that I needed to get done and once I did it I would feel better/more fulfilled, and I would stress only about the completion of it, but I wouldn't be actively trying to enjoy the experience of the task. Been like that for a while, just goal oriented, not enjoying the ride. Nausea in the morning. Almost threw up when I was feeling nervous that one night, and felt very nauseous Wednesday morning. Felt super good after talking and playing with Jordan for four hours. Results: Should try: Benadryl He says could try switching SSRI, talk to doctor. Could ask him for advice after talking to psychiatrist. He thinks I should try Benadryl, then NyQuil, then maybe pot (just CBD). I just want to not have the insomnia, but it’s not so terrible so I could deal with it for longer. Could potentially see about going off of Prozac, but it may be too early. Just ask what I should be having sleep wise. Should try to address the retirement thing by thinking about it more. The law school thing I shouldn’t think about. Not productive. Should just talk to Tara and say we can’t address it now, but the equity/the work thing is causing me a lot of stress and we need to address it at some point.